Dear Jesus I place myself at the foot of the cross, standing with your mother who is now my mother for in your suffering you gave her to us. Oh, what love you bestowed upon us in giving us your mother. Thank you, Jesus, you know how I weak I am, so at baptism, She became the Mother of my life never to leave my side.
I compassionate you in your suffering my Jesus, oh how I wish I could do more, give you more. How I long to share in your bitter sorrow, and yet you speak silently in my soul saying ” Your desire means more to me than the action.” Jesus, you are so merciful I do not deserve the gift you have called me to accept. The gift of sharing your cross and yet you placed the cross ever so gently upon my shoulders. I remember that day in February 5 yrs ago, it was lent and I heard your voice calling me to follow you.
Dear Jesus how I trembled in fear when I heard the word cancer. I said in my anxiety: Why Lord why this, you know this mother’s heart and I cannot bear the thought of leaving my children. They are so young, they need me, who will take care of them? this cancer is rare and my chances of surviving are not good.” At that moment your passion and death became food for my soul, my prayer, my meditation. It was on the cross where you showed me where true love is to be found, in the emptying of myself of all that was not of God, of dying to self, of seeing myself for who I really am, of receiving your grace and realizing I cannot do anything without you. You called me to trust in you. Oh, the graces you bestow on all your children who open their hearts and souls to your merciful grace. It consumes all fear and unites our souls forever in love. I finally came to understand that you are not distant from us when we suffer, you are with us in our suffering. You shed tears with us, you hold us close to your Sacred Heart when everything seems lost, you enter into our pain giving weak souls courage to go on. You show us that battle is not lost when we fatigue overwhelms us. Your love becomes a consuming fire. A fire that consumes our sins, makes our souls long for you, a desire to know you more, to love you to the point of death. How good you are Jesus! You first took upon yourself all the sufferings that mankind would have to endure and more so that we would never be alone in our sufferings. We can now say Jesus knows, Jesus is with me, I will never be alone. Jesus is within me. Your love did not stop there. You wanted to give us more, so you give yourself to us daily in the Holy Eucharist, You remain in every tabernacle in every church until the end of time waiting for us to come to you where you ease all pain and wipe away all tears. Where would we be without the Sacraments of the Church? I know I could not go on, my soul would die. We would not know love. Without the gift of your mother, how could I ever be a mother?
You have given me more than I could ever hope to ask for. I know now Jesus, that all that really matters is Love. Only Love makes one able to say “yes’ to the cross. Love picks us up after every fall. Love nails us to the cross. Love is all, it is everything. The Cross and Love are inseparable. I would not change the course of my life for anything. I have touched love and there is no greater joy!