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Come Holy Spirit, Come Light Divine

Come , Grant me the Spirit of Understanding, enlighten my mind with the light of Your Divine Truth. continues his catechesis this week on the gifts of the Holy Spirit. After having examined wisdom as the first of the seven gifts of the Holy Spirit. This week he draws attention to the second gift, the gift of understanding. He goes on to say that:” Born of our sharing in #God’s life through faith and baptism  the gift of understanding enables us to see in all things the unfolding of his eternal plan of .” The gift of understanding allows us to penetrate more deeply into the truths if our faith. The more we love the more we seek, the more we seek the more we find; and when our soul finds that which it loves it begins to understand God in a whole new way. The gift of understanding brings us face to face with the ‘Word who became Flesh.’  Our faith becomes personal and joy-filled  When the gift of understanding penetrates into the souls we are born again in the sense that we now see only what a soul in love with can see.images.jpg This gift sets our souls on fire and we want to share this gift with others because we now know a love, unlike all other loves. This love enables us to give our Fiat’ to Jesus in all that He may ask us. Our Fiat freely given strengthens us to carry our cross after Him, who has loved us so much that He gave His life for us.  This gift surpasses our human way of understanding, and now we began to see things in a divine way; what Pope Francis explained as “Intus Legere,” that is, “to read within.” Now we understand things with God’s understanding. I pray daily asking the Holy Spirit to give me the understanding to obey his will in my vocation as wife and .  We can get so lost in the things of the world that we lose our way, we stop seeing with the eyes of Jesus. We become entangled within ourselves and selfish behaviors set in. The gift of understanding is for all who have been baptized into God’s grace. The  Holy Spirit who helps us penetrate into the divine mysteries.  God communicates with the soul whose love has no limits, so the more we love the more our life reflects the life of God within us. Through the gift of understanding the Holy Spirit opens our soul to a new form of prayer, more simple, more profound, the soul now clings to the truth in all things and feels as though it’s soul has been immersed in the love of God. The soul becomes one with God and lives only by his will. This love is powerful, this understanding of God’s love is what drives us to become saints. For we now see with the eyes of God. Can it get any better than that? “By the light of understanding, I’ve tasted and seen Your profound nature, Eternal Trinity, and the beauty of your creation.” ~Saint Catherine of Siena, The Dialogue~

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Faith, Mom's with cancer, Prayer, Quotes, Saints, Suffering

Fighting Cancer with Prayer

Meditation:  You need not cry very loud   is nearer to us than we think.
Ponder:  living with can bring us to our knees as we wonder where God is in all this pain.
we often feel alone and think no one understands, however that is so far from the truth. is with us in the pain, fear and the loneliness. He doesn’t stand outside the pain but within it. He understands you and wants you to come to him in prayer, he longs to wipe away all tears.
Pray: Psalm 16 today. Take time throughout the day to enter into the presence of God. Let him speak to you, surrender all to him.
Prayer References: Brother Lawrence, Psalm 16
Surrender: Your health to God for he holds us in his hand. Pray for inner peace.

                  

 

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Faith, Mom's with cancer, Suffering

Surrendered to God~ A Mothers Way of the Cross

Living in the present moment abandoned to ‘s will has been my way of of life for the past 6 years.
6 years ago I heard the words I thought I would never hear: you have stomach .
The doctor went on to say that stomach cancer is rare, after lung cancer, stomach cancer is the 2nd leading cause of death among cancer.

Fear,shock and disbelief instantly invaded my life. That was the day my life was forever changed, I had to face my possible death. As a of seven children all I could think about was who would take care of them.home school, and nurture them, how was I going to tell them I have cancer.
“It is most laudable in a married women to be devout, but she must never forget that she is a housewife; and sometimes she must leave God at the altar to find Him in her housekeeping.” – Francis of Rome

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Did I fulfill God’s will in my vocation as a mother? Did my life reflect  the I had for and Mary  and the gift our Catholic is. Would they remember all that I taught them and so seek the truth in all things. This pain was too much to bear, my biggest fear had become a reality.
Within the week I underwent I high risk surgery.Everything went so quickly leaving me numb. Now I see that this was God’s way of protecting me shielding me from the gravity of  what was happening to me.

Surgery lasted 6 hours in which 80% of my stomach was removed along with lymph nodes. The surgeon had to stop surgery because a large tumor was found on my liver and it had to be removed and biopsied. It was benign, how good God is.  I was in intensive care for 3 days. The pain was unbearable due to the surgery and the fact I am allergic to most pain meds. The only prayer I could utter  was Jesus I in You and to love Him with a love that was willing to go to the cross.
Placing my life and in His hands I said yes, yes to the life he had planned for me, yes to Redemptive suffering, to love with a love that is willing to go to the cross and so die to self.

As I left the hospital with the knowledge  that the cancer I had would require a vigilance on my part to be aware of any unusual symptoms and to notify my oncologist.  I will never really be what people call cancer free. When I asked my oncologist if I would be cancer free after 5 years his response was, maybe in 10 years. What they didn’t tell me was they didn’t think I would live past  a year.  Now I know why, I am deficient in most vitamins, I have malabsortion issues, (faulty absorption of nutrient materials from the digestive tract) a continual malaise that is worsening, anemia, my asthma has worsened to the point that I need oxygen.  My stomach is broken,  More days than not I suffer from  emesis  which limits my ability to go anywhere.

 Lord I am the servant of thy servant and I will always say with Mary be it done to me according to thy word.  Mother of all mothers that suffer pray for us.

The past 6 years  faith has carried me, love has sustained me as I had to undergo many ER visits, countless tests and procedures, Dr appt’s too many to count, hospitalizations I so wanted to avoid.
My life belongs to Jesus as I walk the way of the cross knowing I will die on that cross. Joy!

O my God teach me to be generous; to give and not count the cost; to fight and not to heed the wounds; to toil and not to seek for rest; to labor and not to seek for any reward save that of doing your blessed will. -Saint Ignatius of Loyola

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The cross is love, my love crucified with the Love that flows from the Sacred Heart of Jesus, as I receive grace upon grace.  Thank you Jesus for the gift of life, may I never take it for granted but to embrace each day with joy.

“Love is more important than suffering: it gives suffering it’s meaning and makes it acceptable. There can be love without suffering. But suffering without love has no meaning; with love accepted as Christ accepted it, as the saints accept it, it acquires an inestimable value.” –  Saint John Paul I

I pray for all those that suffer know that your life is precious and a gift from God a life to be embraced. You are never alone Love will never leave your side, God is with always. As I share my cancer journey with you it is my hope that it will aid you in some way as journey with Christ.  I ask for your patience as you read this, my eyesight is so poor due to my health.  May God bring you peace and love.

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Quotes

We Must Protect Life

“Everywhere, wherever we find ourselves, wherever we are called to bear witness, we must protect life, we must  guard human beings from everything that can crush them underfoot. Woe to those who inflict suffering. And woe to those who have destroyed a human life, who have desecrated a image of God, even when it was already breathing it’s last, even when it seemed to represent only a vestigejanmot_the-angel-and-the-mother-sm.jpg of humanity.” ~Father Alfred Delp~

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